I've Never Trusted My Own Eyes

It goes on.

dick-rider-dave-strider:

dick-rider-dave-strider:

grandmoms are precious and must be protected at all costs

i told her i was posting this on tumblr and she said “let me know how many hits i get!!!” so just watch this and make an old woman happy

(Source: arin-hans0n, via coolranchcloritos)

ex0skeletal:

Fun shark attack facts:

  • In 1996, toilets injured 43,000 Americans. Sharks injured 13.
  • In 1996, 2,600 Americans were injured by room fresheners. Sharks injured 13.
  • In 1996, buckets and pails injured almost 11,000 Americans. Sharks injured 13.
  • For every human killed by a shark, humans kill approximately two million sharks.

Conclusions:

  1. Humans are assholes.
  2. Sharks are not assholes.
  3. Apparently everyone in 1996 lived in a real-life infomercial.

(via d-d-dropthesass)

screwsociety:

you know girls can tell when you look at their boobs

i don’t care how quickly you glance, 1 second is like 5 seconds in boob time

(via d-d-dropthesass)

satans-advocate:

sext: i want to pay bills and share household duties and approach our late 20’s in a financially and emotionally stable way with you

(via d-d-dropthesass)

I’m always surprised
how unbalanced I become
when your hand lets go.

—Daily Haiku on Love by Tyler Knott Gregson (via perfect)

(Source: tylerknott, via stfulily)